#26 Bebe Ashley, poet

'...the likelihood is that somebody else out there also cares about these things.'

Bebe Ashley lives in County Down. Her work is recently published in The Stinging Fly, Gutter, and Modern Poetry in Translation. Her debut collection, Gold Light Shining, is published by Banshee Press. In 2023, Bebe received the Ivan Juritz Prize for Creative Experiment (Text) and has previously received a Digital Evolution Award in support of a project that explores the poetic potential of Braille and 3D printing.

Where do you write?
I used to write in coffee shops and most of my first drafts would be there but it doesn't work for me anymore so I write nearly everything at home. I’ve started going to the lough and writing along the water there and that’s something I want to do more of. Especially if it’s cold or raining, there’s this real urgency with the first draft or new idea. 

What can we always find on your desk?
A Kaweco fountain pen in one of many colourways. So many notebooks, all with different purposes. Also, during the pandemic, a toy shop near me had to close, and they were selling their shop fittings on Facebook Marketplace. They sold me a whole display case of Faber Castell pencils and I rarely sharpen them. I just go back to the display case and take a new one that is pre-sharpened. Usually, this bundle of pens and pencils and markers is in a chocolate box from Butlers. (They sell the best chocolate). 

Morning writer or late-night words? 
In the evening I can just write and write and write. In the morning, I’m not ready to sit down again so soon after getting up. 

Coffee, tea, nibbles?
When I’m starting, I’ll have a coffee, and then once I’ve stopped messing about and I’m really starting writing, I’ll go and make a decaf coffee. I am only now realising there is nearly always a packet of biscuits within arm’s reach of me. Dark chocolate digestives are probably my favourite because they feel like a proper biscuit. 

What's your most tempting distraction?
Now it’s my cats, Lily and Merlin. I adopted them just over a year ago and they are the absolute best thing, but they are so soft every time they come near me I just want to pet them and make sure they are happy cats. I love it when they sleep next to me and let me type away. Sometimes, I think that makes me work quicker because I know when they wake up they’ll want to walk across the keyboard several times and if I’ve spent a lot of time writing it is only fair I play with them when they wake up. 

What's that we hear on the speakers?
If I’m doing arts admin, it’ll be music from the 80s or something like Robbie William’s swing album. If I’m writing something new or it feels like the writing is hard work then I’ll usually listen to Bach’s Cello suites as there’s something so grounding about these really deep sounds. Last year I was listening to a lot of movie soundtracks like Boy Erased and Hidden Figures and I really like the BBC National Orchestra of Wales recordings so this year it’s On Chesil Beach even though I’ve never seen the film. If I’m really struggling I’ll have to put on a soundscape from my Calm app, usually Wind in Pines or Rain on Leaves just to fill all the space around me until there’s nothing left but me and the music. 

Have you got any pre-writing rituals?
I try to at least put away the books and notebooks or whatever I was using for the last time I was writing as otherwise they pile up so quickly and it’ll take me months to put them away. 

Perfect bookshop to hide on a rainy day?
I love No Alibis in Belfast. They are so speedy at ordering anything and everything if they don’t have it. A car chase was filmed driving past it in Line of Duty too which I massively cheered at when I saw it on the TV. 

Favourite word in the English language?
Serendipitous is one of my favourite words because it is a beautiful way of trying to make sense of things that so often have little logical explanation. These happy coincidences can lead you down a path in life you’ve not had the confidence to follow yet and trusting in serendipity is the best way I’ve found to let the universe decide things for me. 

I also really love ‘innards’ and will use it at any opportunity in the autumn and winter. Oh, it’s cold, would you like a hot drink to warm your innards?

Dream writing location?
There’s a residency in Finland at Kilpisjärvi Biological Station in Lapland, run by the University of Helsinki, that I really want to go to. They often host artists alongside the scientists who work there and the environment looks incredible. It’s right on a fell, and in every season, all the photos I’ve seen of it are stunning. I don’t know how productive residencies are for me since I’ve not been on one yet but I think even if I don’t write a single thing the atmosphere must be beneficial. 

One poem that has changed your life:
Homewrecker by Ocean Vuong. An earlier version published online used ‘and’ but the version in Night Sky with Exit Wounds used the ampersand. I messaged Ocean on tumblr to ask why and the care he gave me in his answer really opened up the world of poetry for me. You can ask obscure questions about things, that to most people wouldn’t matter, and the likelihood is that somebody else out there also cares about these things.